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There was a chance of cold feet this afternoon when it was time for me to hitch up "The Tiny," my newly purchased 2007 T@B, by myself for the first time, and then drive it 45 miles (without my husband Bill's supervision) to a respected trailer shop for some maintenance.
My fear said: why today? Why not tomorrow? Or later in the week?
I had compiled a checklist, like hooking up the electrical for the brake lights, hooking up the safety chains and the emergency brake cable, backing the car up, lowering the tongue to the ball, etc. Near the top of the list was "Take off cover."
Still, I thought, what's so special about Monday? Tuesday's good, right? I forced myself to go outside and at least touch the thing. And then I saw that last night's windstorm had blown the cover right off. One of my duties was already done. I took that as a sign from god, and proceeded through all my steps. I texted Bill a picture of the setup and asked: "Does this look right?" Yes, he said, and reminded me to not text during the drive. Check.
I drove with my dog along the backroads and byways from New Orleans to Pearl River, Louisiana, close to the Mississippi state line. I saw poverty, I saw wealth, I saw camps on stilts along the bayous and lakes. I could have stopped for a swamp tour. Driving along, I realized anew how hard it is to know what's going on from my front porch. I want to know what's happening. I want be out among it in case there is anything I can say or do or write to help relieve suffering among my fellow humans.
My two rules for the trip were to stay off the Interstate (not ready for that!), and no backing up. Not ready!
Almost to my destination, I got myself into a pickle and had to back The Tiny up onto a highway, where a gentleman in a tall black pickup truck stopped and waved for me to continue. Oh no! Not an audience. But I remembered what The Tiny's previous owner Nancy told me: put your hand at the bottom of the wheel and turn it the way you want the trailer to go. It worked! I backed out of there like a boss.
From there I proceeded to accidentally turn onto the Interstate. OMG. Within minutes, I had inadvertently faced down my two biggest fears.
I am so ready for this.